you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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