I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Randomize
