he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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