well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
