iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
