I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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