My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize