I seem to have left my pride at pride
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
