Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize