this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Randomize