oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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