can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
