yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
My breasts were aching with rage.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
