we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
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