i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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