question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
