This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
