is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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