Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
