quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
