Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
