i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize