Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
