I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
