Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
