good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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