I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
