Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
