i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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