had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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