i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
