Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
i think we sleep fucked last night...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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