i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
there was a trapeze. enough said
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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