I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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