No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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