If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
