I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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