its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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