Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize