So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Randomize
