Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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