we have officially lost it.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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