if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Randomize
