I don't think brook has ever known best
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize