Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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