Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
