He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
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