k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
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