and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
God, I missed his penis.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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