Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
